how do you start a conversation with someone without sounding lame do you just be like Hey man how many cool scooter tricks can u do
DON’T EVER ASK ANYONE IF YOU LOOK OKAY BECAUSE YOU ALWAYS LOOK FUCKING MAJESTIC. EVEN AT 5AM WHEN YOU GET UP TO PEE AND CATCH SIGHT OF YOURSELF IN THE BATHROOM MIRROR AND YOUR HAIR IS EVERYWHERE AND YOU’VE GOT PILLOW CREASES ON YOUR FACE, EVEN WHEN YOU’RE OUT AND YOUR TOP IS DIRTY AND DOESN’T MATCH YOUR PANTS, EVEN WHEN YOUR DRINK IS DOWN YOUR TOP AND YOUR MAKE UP ACROSS YOUR FACE.
100% FUCKING MAJESTIC
If I’m a sarcastic asshole when I talk to you its either because I really like you and feel comfortable teasing you
Or I really hate you and don’t care if you know it
Good luck figuring out which one
(Source: nontarian)
